Life, if you want it too or not, gathers marks. Traces of what was or was meant to be avoided, who was and is, where you’ve been, how you chose to engage and how others treated you, and the why you either deliberately or inadvertently took from your experiences. Some marks will be gentle traces – like a snail’s trail across a rock on a sunny day, quick to vanish and only possibly remembered as a memory rarely triggered. Other marks become a part of you – gashed wounds, scarring over and aching while they heal. Or, deep harmonies woven into the fabric of your soul allowing you to dance and bring forward a melody that wouldn’t be noticed but for the notes surrounding and supporting it. Other marks formed by a gradual wearing of habit and pattern that were never meant to leave their trace and yet there they are deeply and undeniably part of who you have become.

Not all marks are formed by edge experiences. Most of the subtle marks left by daily patterns and choices are regular life experiences. Often not noticeable until you’ve found a need to turn around and look back. While the edges of those marks are often smooth and soft – gradually getting deeper and more noticeable with the passage of time – their influence can be significant because of their natural inclusion in your life. Is this insidious or a blessing? Probably both.

Marks formed by edge experiences can be ragged, victimizing experiences. They can also be delightful, fulfilling experiences. They can be both at the same time, but often not understood as both during the immediate events.

How you interact with your marks brings deeper change. If only careening through life bouncing from one experience or event to the other, you can be left bruised and battered. Exhausted and empty and in desperate need of being hauled on a beach for major repairs and stem to stern rebuilding. Or, even worse, being used as scrap parts for another build.

Yet, if you can find a way to build awareness while experiencing, it might be possible to work with the mark being inflicted upon you. To weave the experience in much like a melody with supporting and building harmonies. Altering it’s effects upon you to move from forced to adapted.

There are many experiences, perhaps the majority of all experiences, whose origins and direction are beyond the individual’s control. The feeling of overwhelm is understandable. But having awareness that searches for space for the individual to hold their place and work toward owning their response to the mark being made – can be life changing.

Something that many of us haven’t realized, that we could chose a different response. That we can take our marks and the edges we encounter and pick up the threads that we can hold and own – choosing the direction forward. From a position of bringing forward something we design, own, and hold. An awesome thing to consider.